Waiting

Despite everything you've put me through,
I still love you,
Yes I do.


I know you don't love me in the same way,
at least not for now, but I'll wait for that day,
And when it comes I'll smile and say:

I have everything I'll ever need,
My girl by my side and a bottle of mead
Living for her has become my creed.

But soft, that day may never come
Leaving me feeling both alone and dumb,
But despite this, I will not succumb.


For if I give up, and it was meant to be
It'll be to late for me to see
Then time when You and I, become We

Why Am I Not Worthy?

Why am I not worthy?
Of being able to hold you tight?
Why am I not worthy?
Of being able to call you mine?
Why am I not worthy?
Of kissing you goodnight?
Why am I not worthy?
Of having your heart divine?

Oh, why am I not worthy?
Of receiving that sweetest kiss?
Why am I not worthy?
Of receiving love too big to hide?
Why am I not worthy?
Of being the one that you dearly miss?
Why am I not worthy? 
Of standing by your side?

WHY am I not worthy?
Of having you lay in my arms?
Why am I not worthy?
Of keeping you inside my heart?
Why am I not worthy?
Of protecting you from any harm?
Why am I not worthy?
Of having nothing keep us apart?

It's because she's amazing and I'm a loser,
She's like the ocean while I'm just a puddle.

We Can Give Society the Middle Finger

We can drive into the country side,
You and I.
Guided by only the starlight
And the foolish dreams of our youth.


We'd go where no man has gone before
And tread together,
before the night
In spite of, whatever fears are racing through our minds.


We can give society the middle finger,
Abandon the world and everybody in it
Then live and love together
Until the end of time.

In the End.

Fine tunes and finer friends
I'd hate for this time to end
But in the end, everything ends
And all your friends will be dead.


You can try to make amends,
But it doesn't matter in the end
because in the end, everything ends
And there'll be no one with whom to make amends.


I see no point to the things you send,
Because everything brakes in the end
Because in the end, everything ends
And no one will be there to get the things you send


But if in the end, everything ends
Then why can't we have fun my friend
Come with me, and we'll pretend
That it all matters in the end

The Great Pretender

Why do I feel like I'm always pretending?
Your eyes free me from my lies.


I can't even tell you where this seems to be going,
It's a feeling I despise.


I need to know if there's to be an ending,
To this lack of feeling that's inside.


And now it seems as if I'm never showing
The man I truly am inside


And the messages I'm sending with the look inside your eyes
Are the ones that people never find


They call me The Great Pretender,
And I know that they have a reason why.
They call me The Great Pretender,
Cos my life is just a masquerade of lies.

Thoughts of Her

"I'll always be there"
She told me.
"My love will never die"
She lied.
She's still here
Not in substance,
But in thought
Wrecking & Distressing
My waking mind


The thought of her
With another guy
Makes me want to cry
I guess I was never good enough
Just a waste of her fucking time


The thought of her
The thought of I
The thought of us

And the times we had


The thought of her
and what she made me:
Which was a better guy
A better lover,
Better friend,
With better thoughts
Within his mind


The thought of her,
Cheating me,
Leaving me alone to die


The thought of her
and what she did
Makes me wonder,
and ask "But why?"

Running Away

Our love is like a lion lost at sea,
How we got there is far beyond me,
But what I do know, and what seems to be true
Is that we're running away, both me and you.


Running away from our fears and our faults,
Running away from all the things we did wrong,
Running away from all the love that we lost,
Running away... in hopes of being found


And now it seems that I've been away for so long,
We don't speak and when we do it seems wrong,
And the feelings I once had are now gone
So I'm running away...
Running... away.


Running away from our fears and our faults,
Running away from all the things we did wrong,
Running away from all the love that we lost,
Running away... in hopes of being found


And I know that the faith you had in me's gone,
And the love you had for me seems wrong
It's ceased to exist,
So you're running away...


Running away from our fears and our faults,
Running away from all the things we did wrong,
Running away from all the love that we lost,
Running away... in hopes of being found


I know that they say that absence makes the heart grow fonder,
But when you're out of sight, you're out of mind.

American Beauty.

 "It was one of those days when it's a minute away from snowing and there's this electricity in the air, you can almost hear it. And this bag was, like, dancing with me. Like a little kid begging me to play with it. For fifteen minutes. And that's the day I knew there was this entire life behind things, and... this incredibly benevolent force, that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid, ever. Video's a poor excuse, I know. But it helps me remember... and I need to remember... Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it, like my heart's going to cave in."


- Ricky Fitz (American Beauty)


The first searing screech of a new born child.
The song of the lonely blue jay, looking for a companion near the end of mating season.
The cold wind blowing against your face as you take a long bike ride going no where.
That feeling you get the first time you see the girl of your dreams.
The feeling you get when you lose her, or find out she's just not interested.
The euphoria that overwhelms you after your first successful football game.
The sadness that keeps you and the entire team silent on the way home from a lost game.
The taste left in your mouth after your first kiss.
That bitter taste left in your mouth after drinking a cup of coffee.
The warmth and love given at Christmas time.
The pain and sorrow felt during the funerals of loved ones.
The brutal swelling of your eye, after getting punched in the face for the first time.
The bruises on your legs left after starting your first riot.
The freedom of the open road and the feeling it gives you.
The oppression of the institution, how it traps, kills our imaginations, yet if you're lucky, inspires us.
The warm embrace of your mother after a long hard day.
The scolding she gives you for not picking up your room.
The mere fact that you woke up in this morning.
The fact that you slept a couple hours last night.
Having someone you know will stick you through thick and thin.
Having people that abandon you when times get tough, so you learn who your real friends are.
The crisp taste of fresh water in your dehydrated mouth after taking a long run
The sweat and blood dropped while in the middle of it.
The feeling you get after a having a long day, and you finally get to lie on your bed.
The relaxation achieved during a nice hot shower.
How you can get strength out of even the bad times in life, where nothing seems to be going right.
The fact that you can find love in almost anything.
The tingling you get in your chest when you know you've done something right, even if you got absolutely nothing out of it
The satisfaction you get when you give your time away, to help others.
The cold, hard feeling of rejection.
The warm, elated feeling of hearing the word "yes".
The first few drops of sweat that fall off your forehead after weeks stripped of exercise.
The taste of that first tempting red velvet cupcake, after months of being on a steady diet.
The feeling in your hair when you stick your head out of a car window in a foreign country, embracing the difference in smell and sound, yet knowing its the same sun you feel back at home


I guess what I'm trying to say is that there's beauty in everything, the good and the bad. 
You just need to look for it